Scenes We'd Like To See: Series 6, Episode 9
The following is a guide to the Scenes We'd Like To See topics and suggestions made in the ninth episode of the sixth series. Key *'HD' – Hugh Dennis *'AP' – Andy Parsons *'FB' – Frankie Boyle *'RH' – Russell Howard *'MM' – Michael McIntyre *'LL' – Lauren Laverne Topics Lines You Wouldn't Hear In a Sci-Fi Film *'FB:' We've discovered an alien queen, and she's laid enough eggs to take over the galaxy. This writing, it says "Katona". *'HD:' I am C-3PO. This is my cousin, WD-40. *'RH:' Alright, Chewie, you look different after that back, sack and crack wax! (Chewbacca groan, they cry) *'MM:' My name is Obi-Wan Kenobi. This's my brother, Obi-Careful, my sister, Obi-Have, and my dog, Obi-Asport! *'FB:' Use the force, Luke. I've ran out of lubricant. *'HD:' Yeah, that's, er, that's right, we aliens have learned your language by, er, listening to your radio broadcasts! *'FB:' The androids are going berserk, Captain. Let's try switching them off, and then on again. *'HD:' Stardate 2171.6. Captain's Log: Still won't flush, I'll try again later. *'FB:' Vader, you look like a big black dildo! *'MM:' Captain, erm, I've been repeatedly firing this laser at that alien, er, but all I've managed to do is improve its eyesight and give it a Brazilian. *'FB:' It's not easy being a Vulcan, Captain. Due to my death grip, I can't masturbate. *'RH: '(Chewbacca groan, coughs)- Had that hairball in there for years. *'HD:' I need to break into the Death Star's computer system. Who knows Darth Maul's mother's maiden name? *'FB:' Captain, the ethereal sounds being made by this beautiful dying creature from another world...IS SOME FUNKY SHIT! Things You Wouldn't Hear On The Radio *'FB: '''In that episode of ''The Hugh Dennis Story, Hugh Dennis was played by Bruce Willis, Steve Punt was played by Hugh Dennis and the band was Showaddywaddy. ('HD: '''You...) *'MM: 'You touch my turnips and I'll fuck you up! (hums ''The Archers theme tune) *'AP: '''And now for a travel update. There's an accident on the M1. It's a good one, so hurry up! There's FLAMES and EVERYTHING! *'FB: 'Next, ''A Book at Bedtime: Martin Jarvis reads the speeches of Hitler in a high pitched girl's voice. *'LL: '''Good afternoon, this is Radio 4, and I have a regional accent. *'RH: 'Next on Radio 4, The Dogging Forecast. *'FB: 'Here on Traffic Watch we're predicting long delays on the M4, when I'm about to hit my ex-wife's car with this helicopter. *'HD: 'And now, it's the panel show where our panel try to stave off premature ejaculation, yes, it's ''Just a Minute! *'MM: '''Good morning, this is breakfast with Tony Blackburn! I'm not actually on the radio, I've broken into your kitchen. You want toast? *'RH: 'Next, more lesbian propaganda with ''Woman's Hour. *'FB: '''Well, you've certainly stumped the ''Gardeners' Question Time panel. None of us know how to bring a fox to orgasm. *'AP: '''You're listening to Heart FM: The same 5 songs, all day long. *'FB: '''6 AM! WELCOME TO THE BREAKFAST SHOW! WHO'S UP AT 6 AM?! MY WIFE'S LEAVING ME! MY DAD DIDN'T GET UP AT 6 AM AND HE WAS A FUCKING MINER! Category:Scenes We'd Like To See